for those of you in love

There’s a lot you can find out there about love.
Some of its great and inspiring, and a lot of it is crap and just hallow platitudes. 
But having spent a lot of time reading through it all, there’s something important about love that we’re not talking enough about. 

for those of you in love, 
this is for you: 

A while ago my girlfriend took me to a hot yoga class. 
It wasn’t my first but I was still new enough to have no idea what I was doing. 
We went in, it’s dark and hot in there, we lay out our mats, people are sighing loudly all around me, the class starts, and I can feel my spirit begin to realign with my body. 

Then the instructor says we’re about to enter into our first flow and begins to call out names of postures I've never heard of. Everyone else seems to know what’s going on as they begin to sigh even more loudly and bend their bodies into positions I didn’t think anatomically possible, and it all just becomes a bit too much for me. I'm feeling overwhelmed and about to throw in the towel, thinking "this will never happen! I cant bend that way! I’ll never get through this!," when the instructor comes over and whispers: 
“Keep working. It wont work if you don’t sweat”

It wont work it you dont sweat. 

If that isn’t some wisdom to live by, I dont know what is. 

It helps us understand the truth that anything good in life,
anything worth having,
anything that brings joy,
anything that draws us deeper into the kind of life we were always meant to have, 
its going to take sweat.
It will take effort, time, patience and struggle. 

And now here’s that important thing we need to talk more about: that includes love. 

We like to think love is easy but the truth is, love is anything but easy. 

It’s anything but easy because when we talk about love, 
about deep, true, I-would-do-anything-for-you kind of love,
we’re not just talking about having the warm fuzzies. 

We’re talking about having respect.
We’re talking about being faithful. 
We’re talking about practicing grace and justice.
We’re talking about showing support. 
We’re talking about showing up and being there. 

Love isn’t easy because to do love, to do all of that, it takes so. much. work. 

And here’s the thing about that. Here’s why love needs that sweat:

it’s in the sweat we find why this love is so deep and true and why it hums with such reverence.

It’s in the sweat that you find the grace that makes love endure.
It’s there you find the strength to offer the things you don't have. 
It’s there you find the support to become the kind of person you want to be. 
It’s there you find the space to love that person just as they are. 

It’s there you find what makes this love different from anything else and why this love is so worth it. 

So to those of you in love:

You've fallen in love. That was the easy part. Now the work begins: 

Offering that love. 
Staying in love
Deepening that love
Growing that love.

And when you’re feeling overwhelmed, thinking you can’t bend that way, and want to quit, remember: 

“Keep working. It wont work if you don’t sweat”